You know you're ______ when....

camita · Miss Universe Joined: 07 Jan 2007 Posts: 1128 Smiles: +29

You know you're from a small town when:

You schedule parties around the schedule of different police officers, since you know which ones would bust you and which ones wouldn't.

It's cool to date someone from the neighboring town.

Your teachers call you by your older siblings names.

The town population increases by one-third when the universities go on break.

You ever went to parties at a lake, old mine site, or in the middle of a dirt road.

You could never buy cigarettes because all the store clerks knew how old you were (and, if you were old enough, they'd tell your parents, anyhow)

Weekend excitement involves a trip to a Wal-Mart.

"The" hangout is a gas station or McDonalds.

Everyone from the age of 13 - 35 party together.

Sad, and yet very true.
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My brain's repeating "if you've got an impulse let it out", but they never make it past my mouth..

pink · Posted: Thu May 17, 2007 2:02 pm Post subject:

i cant think of anything but when i do ill post
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boarderlinefrenzy · Posted: Sun May 20, 2007 6:23 am Post subject:

^^true that
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amyamy8 · Posted: Sun May 20, 2007 6:53 am Post subject:

You know you're from BC (granted, most of this generally applies to the lower mainland and vancouver island) when...
1. You know the provincial flower: the dogwood
2. You can taste the difference between Tim Hortons, Second Cup, and Seattle's Best.
3. Lower Mainland only: The last time there was snow, you were so confused you tried to snort it.
4. You can't tell, is marijuana still illegal?
5. You hate the Calgary Flames with a passion.
6. You point out vancouver landmarks in nearly every movie and TV show
7. You don't understand why Manitoba and Saskatchewan are considered western Canada
8. While driving on your morning commute, you switch between heat and air conditioning multiple times
9. You consider 2 degrees freezing cold
10. You know that there is actually a town called Dawson Creek
11. You know how to distinguish between the different types of asian food
12. You know how to pronounce Squamish, Osoyoos, Ucluelet, Esquimalt, Sooke & Nanaimo.
13. You actually care about the CFL.
14. You still believe the Canucks have a shot at winning the stanley cup.
15. You can point out at least two ski resorts, even if the city is coated in fog.
16. A nice day means when you can see the mountains
17. You go bankrupt from paying your rent
18. You have come to accept that there are only two seasons
19. Cold and Rainy, and Warm and dry
20. You don't understand what's so great about toronto
21. <removed>
22. You never go camping without waterproof matches and a 100% water proof raincoat
23. You know more people with boats than air conditioners
24. You have trouble figuring out why french is an official language or why we have to learn it in school
25. You swear that you're in China or Japan
26. You don't find it wierd that every time you go downtown, some crazy guy is talking to himself
27. Your premier was convicted of drunk driving
28. You know what venti and a macchiato are.
29. You ski and play golf in the same day
30. You are aware that Surrey, New West, Burnaby, Delta, Port Moody, North Van, West Van, White Rock, Abbostford, Langley and Richmond are NOT part of the City of Vancouver
<From here down, the points are all member submitted. keep 'em coming>
31. You're confused when people from anywhere else say that the hill you just walked up is a mountain
32. You think that Atlantic Salmon doesn't even deserve to be called salmon when compared to Pacific Salmon
33. You've had a California roll for lunch.
34. You take the bus and are shocked to hear two people carrying on a conversation in English.
35. You don't even listen when the forecast announces "chance of showers."
36. The more expensive the car, the worse the driver.
37. when you get more excited about the canucks making the playoffs than you do about the olympics coming to vancouver
38. have to take a ferry to get to your capital city.
39. you are aware that vancouver and vancouver island are not one in the same
40. You're legally an adult, but you still can only drive with one passenger in the car.
41. you can tell the difference between the fresh mountain air and the air in other provinces right when you get out of the airport
42. you know that your province started the "white towel" craze that so many other sports teams have borrowed.
43. you consider a week with no rain to be "good weather".
44. you drink the tap water
45. You know the only thing dividing China and India is the Fraser River
46. the only time you can get a tan is if you go to a tanning salon
47. when at any given time about 90% of people you pass on the street are wearing either LuLuLemmon or Mountain Equipment Co-Op clothing
48. climbing the grouse grind is something you do for fun
49. You HATE Mick McGeough
50. you hate the leafs for no real reason
51. you are SHOCKED to hear someone speaking French.
52. everytime you go out you see at least two people pulled over for speeding/street racing.
53. you can't stand when someone from outside Canada asks if your from Toronto.
54. you ask Albertans if they really have ski slopes.
55. the police don't respond to a crime scene because they are busy trying to find any reason to pull over a "N" license driver.
56. You are tired of people wanting to go to Barkerville
57. You know in Greater Vancouver that West Van, the west side, and the west end are all different places.
58. There are few things you hate more then following people from other provences on the highway because they aren't use to all the turning.
59. You have to check the sports headlines daily to find out who the new Canucks goalie is. (Thank god for Luongo, we don't have to do this anymore)
60. You chuckle when you say the words "fast ferries"
61. the news has extensive coverage of just how badly people in vancouver can drive in 3 inches of snow
62. you get a harsher punishment for having an extra passenger with an L license than your premier does for driving drunk
63. you leave the province to see the rest of Canada, you realize that there is nothing better to see.
64. You are genuinely confused with people that don't consider "Pirate Packs" to be an integral part of a healthy childhood.
65. You assume cab fares will cost a minimum of $25.
66. You're slightly irritated by the inaccuracies of Tony Hawk Underground's representation of Vancouver.
67. you think of Kokanee as a discount beer
68. your license is the hardest to fake of any province
69. you're surprised and pissed to have to pay for the luggage carts when you get to any other airport
70. you know that it's "Science World", not the "Telus World of Science".
71. when you don't like the weather you go inside and wait 15 minutes for it to change
72. you say "Im from kelowna" and the ontario-ian says "so do you miss <insert BC city>?" even after you have corrected them 5 times.....
73. your driving on the highway where the speed in the left lane is slower than the right lane
73. You have been lost in the woods on several occasions, you know you will be again, and you're ok with that.
74. You think $1.00/L is cheap for gas
75. you think about hockey or guns n roses when the word 'riot' is brought up
76. if you know what Gore-tex is and why it's important, if all your coats have hoods, and/or if you've spent more than 90 dollars on a rain jacket
77. your province's football team are Grey Cup Champs!
78. while celebrating, your province's football team became the only one to ever break the Grey Cup
79. You know what being "beyond Hope" means
80. Forest Fires are almost a tradition - just like Thanksgiving
81. 1994 means more to you than just the year of the OJ simpson case!
82. you return by plane and the first things you say is: "I can BREATHE!"
83. the first time you drive through the prairies you see no mountain, no trees, no ocean -- and promptly have a panic attack
84. you use the parking brake whenever you park because in bc you're always automatically parked on an incline.
85. the three main universities are on an island, peninsula and mountain top
86. you actually joined this group
87. You laugh when snow is mentioned in Victoria's weather forecast, and laugh harder when someone actually believes it.
88. you know that mt washington isn't actually in washington
89. all the graffiti you find is written in full sentances
90. you've heard about "the big one" and you just couldn't care less
91. You actually pull over to the right and slow down as soon as you faintly hear a siren..
92. You could read a decent size novel before you're admitted into the hospital
93. You know how scary it is to drive next to a loaded logging truck.
94. You can't stand Albertan drivers. Not to mention getting stuck behind them on the Sea-to-Sky
95. (mostly vancouver) You find yourself giving half hour long explanations on what the skytrain is
96. you can identify all the gulf islands from the ferry terminal names
97. the only thing you like about Quebec is the maple syrup
98. your capital city doesnt have enough ploughs for a snow storm.
99. you can recite the BC Ferries safety announcement by heart
100. You care more when a referee makes a bad call during the canucks games then when the Premier got arrested for drunk driving
101. You know you're in B.C. when you find a bear in your backyard then walk to the Starbucks a few blocks away while you wait for the bear to leave
102. you know that an "1 1/2 hour ferry" really means 3 hours. Time to get to the ferry, wait for the ferry, get on the ferry, eat in the buffet on the ferry,and then wait for the broken down VW to get off the ferry.
103. the mountain you grew up skiing on is now too busy with foreigners for you to get a decent amount of runs down the hill.
104. You've paid $6 for an full meal of sushi.
105. you are surprised when people tell you they don't ski or snowboard
106. you watch the weather report for a good laugh
107. you can pick out the Albertan drivers in disguise as one of us
108. you've managed to convince people in florida you live in an igloo and have a pet polar bear'
109. The reasoning for number 4 is not simply because of how abundant Cannabis is, but because you are too baked to remember.
110. you know that the only thing beyond Hope is Hell's Gate
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pink · Posted: Wed Jun 20, 2007 1:34 pm Post subject:

i found some. you know your serbian when..... its funnier if you actually are serbian (me) Happy

ah and btw serbs drink.a lot 8)

You Know You're Serbian When...
-Your mom uses lard instead of Crisco to fry eggs.

-Your family owns a coffee grinderand a nut grinder

-You have 17 consonants and 2 vowels in your last name

-Duck tape is your father's only tool next to using a kitchen knife as a screwdriver.

-Baba chased you around the house with Kamilica to drink and Vicks
to shove up your nose when you had a cold.

-Your 15 year old sister can out-drink any Amerikanac

-You get a C in history, but can recite every Serbian king, in order, from Czar Dusan

-Your dad never told you about the birds and the bees

-At your wedding you know only about a third of the people there.

-At your wedding you have a minimum of 350 guests.

-At your wedding the first song is always "danas majka zeni svoga sina".

-You have at least 3 slave to attend to on the same day.

-All slave have the same cuisine \"supa, sarma, Pecenje\".

-All weddings have the same cuisine \"supa, sarma, Pecenje\".

-All christenings have the cuisine \"supa, sarma, Pecenje\".

-A Serb girl tries to look 23 but she's actually 15.

-At least one of your friends name is "Dragan".

-You are somehow related to every 1 in 3 Serb girls/boys.

-You don't actually attend University, just hang out there and play
"tablic".

-You can derive "Steve" from "Nenad".

-You can derive "David" from "Zeljko".

-You can derive "Mark" from "Mirko".

-Your father calls you a "dummy" for not knowing how to do something he can't either.

-Even the fat Serb chicks put on the tightest skirt possible.

-Your father expects you to study or "hit da books" every waking hour
that he's home, and he expects nothing less than an "A".

-A cold shiver runs down your spine when your mom threatens by using the word "tata" in a sentence.

-Your Deda cuts the grass with knee high black socks and slippers.

-You work out six days a week, but somehow you dad whoops your ass in
like five seconds after he comes home from a thirteen hour day from the
bakery/factory/food business.

-You own a leather jacket.

-You have three pairs of black shoes.

-You drive a nicer car than your parents.

-There is a 120-gallon barrel of wine and Cabbage in your garage.

-There is more alcohol in your liquor cabinet than at the local bar.

-You hear birds chirping and see the sun rise every time you come home
from the bar.

-Your mother still makes your bed.

-You are 18 years old but your parents still call you by your brother's
name.

-Every car your family owns has chrome wheels.

-Your Baba calls all cereal "Corn Flakes".

-You can hear your dad snoring from across the street.

-Your dad carries around enough money to buy a car.

-Your dad wears black socks to work everyday.

-Your Baba and Deda live in your basement.

-You wear a DKNY t-shirt when you work out.

-Your parents never go on vacations because they are afraid to leave you home alone for a week.

-You have all brand new appliances in your kitchen but your mom cooks in

the basement with the stove from your old house.

-Your baba swears more than you do.

-Your dad claims not to be a racist but insists the whole world should speak Serbian.

-You are prohibited from speaking English in you own home.

-Before school every morning your parents had to look after the sheep, milk the cows, gather all hay, feed the animals etc..

-Both your parents had to walk to school barefoot in the snow, 5km uphill both ways. And over rocks.

-Your parents can't pronounce "Thursday".

-You argue that your mobile phone is better than anyone else's.

-Your mum makes her own bread and slices it with a BIG kitchen knife to a thickness of 5cm per slice.

-You have the biggest sandwiches at school, always consisting of "prsut or salami".

-Your dad wears dress socks with tennis shoes.

-Each one of your friends has a distinct, annoying laugh.

-All the hot girls/guys are your cousins.

-Your dad starts to swear obsessively whenever he watches CNN.

-Your parents have gone on vacation ONCE and it was to Yugo.

-There's oil stains on your driveway.

-There's at least one relative that your family refuses to talk to.

-Being someone's KUM really has no meaning.

-Your dad thinks he knows everything about the world today.

-You had to break off a tree branch from your back yard, so your dad could whoop your ass with it.

-When your walls are crowded with icons of saints

-Your last name ends with a CH

-You have black hair and brown eyes

-When you speak Serbian and not English on your"You know when you're
Serb" list

-When you are reading this list and you're cracking up

-Your mom uses lard instead of Crisco to fry eggsand tells you it's
good for you

-When you are hopelessly trying to bring the Serbian community together

-When you make jokes based on your own tragedy

-Your church has a fully loaded bar

-One of your relatives is a construction worker / painter

-You are high maintenance

-The main menu for lunch is cabbage and beans.

-A loaf of bread is eaten for lunch.

-You don't want to have or do any business with Serbs.

-The minute Church services are finished you run to the bar in the Church Hall and get plastered

-You only go out of town for Serbian Tournaments and Dances

-Your dad pronounced the silent b in Climb, plumber, comb etc.

-Your parents have a shot of rakija(brandi) for breakfast

-You started to drink at the age of 12

-You don't talk to your Kumovi

-Your mom wears her bra as a bathing suit

-It takes over 8 years to finish college

-If you are female, you first name ends in "A"

-You have a Serbian cross, flag, or icon, hanging from your rear view mirror

-Your uncle makes his own wine that is stronger than rakija

-You think everything is a conspiracy

-Your dad thinks that the phone is bugged

-If you are a girl and not married by the age of 20 you are an old maid

-There is a baba hotline 1-800-CALL-BABA

-Your mother insists that "promaja" will kill you

-Your mother insists that you must eat something with "kasika" at
least several times a week

-You base your whole life on the fortune in your coffee cup

-You eat canned peppers and ajvar with every meal

-You have a Kosovka Devojka goblen hanging on your wall

-You live with your mom and dad until you are married

-You have a pair of wool slippers that your baba knit

-Your mom tells you not to sit on concrete or your ovaries are going to
freeze

-On your birthday, your parents make you take a picture cutting the cake with a huge knife.

-Your dad washes the garage floor with the hose wearing cheap criss-cross brown flip-flops.

-There's a slab of fat in your fridge called "slanina"

-Rakija is used to cure all illnesses, celebrate all occasions and as a massage lotion

-When you celebrate Christmas and Easter and New Year two weeks after
everyone else

-At your birthdays everyone is singing "Happy brzday tu u"

-You wear as much gold as your girlfriend/mother/sister

-When the head of a pig with an apple in its mouth is looked upon as a
delicacy

-As a kid you are paid to steal the bride's shoe at a wedding

-When your baba will not accept the fact that you're not hungry

-You teach all your American friends Serbian cuss words

-When your friends can't believe you got drunk at a church function

-When all your Serbian friends dad's kick your ass.

-When all your Serbian friend's dads offer you slivo at age 16.

-Your Tata complains da ga ledga BOLE!!!

-When you had/have a pet named Mishko.

-Your parents pronounce three, thirteen and thirty three as tri, tirteen, and tirty tree.

-You get the mumps and your baba ties slabs of bacon (slanina) around
your ears to cure the mumps.

-You have a vegetable garden in your backyard consisting of a variety of peppers, onions and tomatoes.

-You have a freezer that is loaded with meat products, especially pork.

-You have a cold cellar that includes a variety of meat/deli products,pickled goods, and wine.

-When your parents constantly say you'll end up a nobody if you don't graduate from University

-When you have to reassure your Mother that her cooking is the best

-When your Mom proclaims that she doesn't gossip about other Serbs
but full well knows that she does

-When you're an adult and still recieve Easter chocolate

-When you had to go perform as an altar boy

-You go to a restaurant and you bring your own drinks

-Whenever you went by Baba's house, she offered you supa, sarma,
pecenje or kolace and got mad if you didn't eat EVERYTHING.

-You are at a zabava and guys try to pick you up with "Hey baby,
what's your slava??"

-In your house, the walls are neon green or yellow and your carpet is brown

-You can think of nothing you would rather do an a Saturday night than go to a dance

-Your American friends will never understand why you spend so much time
at church events and you are the farthest thing from holy that there is

-You live for the annual Folkfest and/or Soccer Tournament

-Whenever you kiss somebody, you kiss them 3 times.

-When your grandma says that farting is healthy.

-You have 4 pairs of opanke in your attic, basement, closet...

-When you are told that you'll grow a tail if you drink coffee at a young age

-You are freaked out by 'Babaroga'

-You took a bath in a lavor when you were a kid.

-Your tata pronounces "oops" as "ups."

-All the older Serbs around you are always worried about drafts.

-You hear the word "BATINE" and you cringe or go into convulsions

-Your tata has a smoke house and smokes all the slanina/prsut/pecenje for the surrounding serb colony

-You have opanke hanging from your rear view mirror

-The first conversation you had as a baby used the words "jebi ga"

-You cant imagine hearing a song without the obligatory "harmonikas
solo"

-You use Shljivovitca down the carburetor to start your 69 Dodge Charger on a cold winter morning

-You know you are a Serb when you live in Detroit and are proud of it!

-You know you are a Serb when you can hear your parents talking, and you are across the street.

-All other action stops when you hear the music : "Boze Pravde",
"Kad sam bio mali\\\", or \\\"Marsirala\\\"

-When you're a girl, and you dye your hair no other colour than
burgundy..

-"Your Baba says everything you do is bad and what you need is a nice
Serbian girl to take care of you!"

-"You're the first of your friends to get hair on his back, and grey hair to follow"

-"Everyone is sure that you're Italian or Greek"

-"Your Baba wastes absolutley no food and even sticks flour in the
freezer to keep fresh"

-"Your Baba lectures you everyday of your life because her own children
know better than to listen to her"

-"No one has ever pronounced your last name right, and every kid on the
block has a nickname for it"

-You know you're Serbian when you don't work and you go shell out
$300 easy on the weekend

-You know you're Serbian, when you are a fan of whatever basketball
team Vlade Divac is on

-You know you're Serbian when your mom has a whole pharmacy in the
medicine cabinet.

-When your mum cuts your hair with a "serpa"

-When your mum calls you "stoka"

-When you can always smell garlic on your parents breath and they insist it kills all the bacteria.

-You know you are a Serb when you go to the annual picnic on the 4th of
July and it's a big car show where your fellow Serbs show off their cars....

-Your parents still prefer to buy cassettes instead of CDs.

-When your Baba made you drink warm water when you had a cold,
because cold water would make you feel sicker

-When your mom tells you not to drink cold water after you have
exercised

-When no matter what age you are or how much smarter than your parents

you are, they will never listen to what you say 'cause you're still their little " beba "

-When your baba tells you that your deda is perfect but don't ask him
anything.

-When your parents know everything you did at the basketball tournament
before you get home

-When the baba grapevine travels faster than the national emergency alert system.

-A Serbian baby shower is as big as most American weddings!

-When your friends can't understand why your summer vacation consists
of playing golf in a town called Farrell or Aliquippa.

-You know you're a Serb when your neighbors never see you during
Memorial Day Weekend because you're traveling with 'that choir'.

-You have not scene baba's hair since deda died.

-When your mother yells at you for taking a shower each and every
morning with her sarcasm "Did you plow the fields today?"

-When all guys balk at the idea of meeting you family, especially the male relatives

-When no matter how old you are, your parents say you are never right.

-When you are 6'5" 250 lbs and your parents think you are too skinny.

-You know at least 20 Tool and Die Makers or Machinists or you are one
yourself.

-Your Dad tells you "kad sam ja bio u tvoje godine..."

-You go to church 2 times a year... Bozic and Uskrs

-When you say yo're hungry, and then go buy pack of smokes

-When your baba chases you down the street with her cipela...

-When your baba rather walk five miles to the grocery store instead of
getting a ride.

-When you have a chicken running around in your back yard...

-When your tata is talking to you and every other word he calls you is
budala...

-When your mama gives you vodka when your teething...

-When your tata whips you before your relatives come over for your
birthday...

-When you hang your clothes in the backyard on a clothes line even though you have a dryer...

-When you are a eating at the kitchen table with your family and you get in trouble for talking.

-You have a shot of rakija followed by a crna kafa and a pack of Malboro's for breakfast.

-You sport the latest Nike and Adidas outfits but have never exercised in your life

-You always have the latest mobile phone on the market

-You can spend 3hrs in a Cafe drinking the same one coffee

-Calling someone for a chat at 1am on a weeknight is the norm

-When your parents call relatives in Yugo they shout to be heard

-Your parents work day and night to build the ultimate brick and concrete mansion so their sin and snaja can live with them in eternal happiness

-When everytime your family needs to buy a household item, your father
asks the salesperson "how much for cash" and continues to bargain
down for at least half an hour

-Your parents believe that being left handed is the sign of the devil

-When as a young boy/girl you have your head shaved to promote a thick
head of healthy hair

-As soon as you tell a neighbour you're Serb they ask you for some rakija

-When your front yard is all concrete ... and your dad then paints it green

-When at least 3 of your cousins are Cro

-When you believe the most famous people in the world are Serbs who
changed their name

-When you're married with kids and your mother still insists on cooking
and cleaning for you

-When on your birthday everyone pulls your ears

-When your baba chases you around the house with a varjaca

-When your parents call you "sine" no matter if your a boy or a girl.

-When your parents only want to invite your Serbian friends in your house

-Your mom gloats about how good Serbian food is but cooks Turkish coffee for all her friends

-Thinking there's no such thing as Santa Claus but believing St Nicholas will come to your house

-When you work part time and drive a BMW

-A cassette or Video of Lepa Brena is in your Video case or radio

-When your tata tells you a narodna poslovica for everything single wrong thing you do and you think that he made them all up just to prove a point.

-Your parents always complain about how the "matematika" you're
doing in school is too easy for kids your age.
-When your baba and deda believe that you got sick because your parents
didn't feed you properly
-When you are watching your favorite basketball team and someone scores
a three pointer you interpret the referee's three fingers in the air as
support for Serbia
-When you open gifts not to tear the wrapping so your baba can reuse the paper and bows
-When there are more fights at a wedding than a championship match
-When you write on your history exam that Nikola Tesla is the father of
electricity not Thomas Edison and you teacher fails you.
-When you make a pilgrimage to Chicago
-When your parents tell you that the laws pertain only to North Amaericans and not them
-When you call your next door neighbor "kone"
-You get scared when your dad sneezes
-When you insist on talking Serbian even when you\\\'re with your American friends
-When you date someone from church
-When all your Serb guy friends insist they're Cetnici
-When your dad likes to sit home and play the harmonika
-When you go on vacation and your dad spends all his time playing tablic at the hotel
-When the spaghetti and macaroni and cheese your mom makes tastes like
lamb from the lamb grease she saved to put in everything
-When tipping rule of thumb is: no need to tip if you will never eat at that restaurant again
-When no one enters your house through the front door. .. everyone is to enter through the garage
-When your cat is named matcak and your dog is named kutcak
-When your parents will only go to the doctor if they are passed out on the floor or have severed a limb
-When to ensure that you will never marry a non-serb, whenever you are in the car with your parents, your parents play Serb music and sing along really loud when the windows are rolled down in the car
-If your real first name isn't Serbian, you have two first names -- one is definitely Serbian.
-When the first thing you do when you walk into a friends house, is take off your shoes, kiss their mom, and shake their dad's hand
-When your friends' parents talk to you like they're YOUR PARENTS
too.
-When you beg a friend going back to Yugo to get you some kajmak
-When you beg a friend going back to Yugo to get you some Serbian
cigarettes
-When you bang the table and break glasses while singing when you're
drunk.
-When your father threatens you with a papuca
-When your father says "samo ako te zgrabim ja"
-Drinking a cold glass of water will get you sick
-When beans are served and your dad tells you that you should call it
"gospodin pasulj"
-You know you are Serb when your boyfriend / husband says to you "cut
bre"
-When you step on poop and your mom tells you that it's a sign of luck
or money
-You know you're a Serb when this list keeps growing and it's getting
hard to edit it!
-Baba's extra refrigerator is the back porch...
-You can't even think about beginning the kolach until 1 Surprised

0 in the
morning, since it's bad luck to make it any earlier than the morning of
slava.It's 2:10 AM when you realize the oven, which deda just
"repaired", won't light...
-Your first real kiss was during the Kissing Kolo.
-You know you're a serb when you are 25, live on you own, and still
sneak up the stairs when you get home at six in the morning.
-You cut up some onions and garlic and then decide what you will make for dinner.
-You think the expression "Don't laugh so much, you will cry"
sounds reasonable
-The word "Sramota!" will deter you from anything
-Every one of your relatives from the old country that immigrates to the the US is an engineer
-Cevapcici on the grill are better than steak any day
-Your parents order "Pepsi , no ice"
-Your grown uncle gets a "batine" from your baba and you don't
think twice about it
-Your majka is fond of saying "Tanks God"
-Garlic flavored boiled pigs feet spread is yummy
-Deda has a 25 year club hat and license plate frame from his steel mill job and lost three fingers achieving that milestone
-Theres a bust of Cica Draza in your house and a hand made afghan on
your recliner
-You can hear Ceca pumping in your car, with the subs cranked to the max, two blocks away
-You understand what "made in the garage" really means
-A week after Slava, Bozic, and Easter you are still eating sarma
-When returning from Jugo, everyone at the airport is staring at you
because your suitcase smells of rakija
-After a few years of working there is a pattern on your leave of absence, you are sick every year on the 7th, 14th, and 20th of January
-You can dance a kolo to anything, including Serbian rock
-You read this list to your mama and tata and all they have to say in their defense is "IC NAT TRU!!!"
-You work on a construction, but when you come to YU for vacation you tell everyone how successful "biznismen" you are.
-You feel nostalgic for drinking and vomiting in front of the liquor store.
-When you eat any kind of meat for lunch and your baba says that the
greasiest part is the sweetest.
-You listen to gusle and you actually LIKE it
-When your mom can bake a cake without sugar, chocolate, flour and oil,
and she calls it "the embargo cake"
-When you're sitting in your room and listening to "narodnjake"
-When your mama and baba have to wear 18 lbs. of gold around their
necks at the zabavas "zato sto narod moze da vidi koliko smo mi bogat!"
-You always buy a Mercedes Benz when you decide to move back to YU.

pink · Posted: Wed Jun 20, 2007 1:38 pm Post subject:

uh oh double post
if you dont understand anything than just ask me!

boarderlinefrenzy · Posted: Thu Aug 16, 2007 4:42 am Post subject:

>If whenever you hear an electronic beep, and you instinctively jump, you might be a swimmer.

>If you have rings around your eyes unrelated to the amount of sleep you got, you might be a swimmer.

>If waking up before dawn to exercise seems normal, you might be a swimmer. (You might also be crazy)

>If jamming a piece of Styrofoam between your legs is not a kinky sexual activity, you might be a swimmer.

>If bugs die of chlorine poisoning when they land on your skin, you might be a swimmer.

>If you sport long, curling hair with split ends on your legs, you might be a swimmer.

>If the phrase "This set with fins" is better than hearing "You just won $1000," you might be a swimmer.

>If you answer, "I don't need to" when someone asks when you showered last, you might be a swimmer.

>If you love a good lightning storm when you have outdoor practice, you might be a swimmer.

>When you learn how to squirt water 15 different ways, you might be a swimmer.

>When your long term goal is to slap your bicep on your lat, you might be a swimmer.

> When you wake up before six for the free doughnuts, you might be a swimmer.

>When you go through so much latex in one season you could wallpaper your room, you might be a swimmer.

>If a friend asks how a certain guy dresses and you reply, "I only see him without his clothes on" you might be a swimmer. [SPEEDOS!!!]

>If your friends have stopped asking you about your plans for the evenings, you might be a swimmer.

>If you go from store to store desperately trying to find your favorite sports drink, you might be a swimmer.

>If the first place you go when you're stressed out is a swimming pool, you might be a swimmer.

>If your daily apparel is held together by knots or is torn and see through, you might be a swimmer.

>If you have an inhaler in every color of the rainbow, you might be a swimmer.

>If the phrase, "50 double armed backstroke with a breast stroke kick makes you happier than anything, you might be a swimmer.

>If being fish-like is a compliment, you might be a swimmer.

>If your friends don't even call you anymore because they know that you have no time to do anything, you might be a swimmer.

>If your nightmares consist of a series of numbers ending in 0 or 5, you might be a swimmer.

>If you have hickeys on your neck, you might be a swimmer or you might be lucky.

>If you sweat chlorine even after showering, you might be a swimmer.

>If you just don't understand the charm of the swim suit edition, you might be a swimmer.

>If getting smacked on the butt doesn't bother you at all, you might be a swimmer.

>If someone asks if you have any siblings and you start listing teammates, you might be a swimmer.

>If you cut yourself every time you shave, because you only do it 3 or 4 times a year and are out of practice, you might be a female swimmer.

> If you are determined, strong, smart and tough, you might be a swimmer.

*If you shamelessly walk around the hallways at school in your bathing suit, you might be a swimmer.

*If you think bald heads are hot, you might be a female swimmer.

*If the person who sits behind you in you're math class always tells you that you reak of chlorine, you might be a swimmer.

* If land is your second home, you might be a swimmer.

* If you sometimes have trouble walking because you aren't use to it, you might be a swimmer.

* If you suck at running, you might be a swimmer.

* If your stronger than many of the guys and all the girls in your grade, you might be a female swimmer.

* If you have to try on 30 shirts just to find one that fits your shoulders, you might be a female swimmer.

* If your hair remains in a wet ponytail throughout the day, you might be a swimmer.

* If when the life guard tryouts say you have to swim a 500 in less than 9 minutes you laugh, you might be a swimmer.

* If you have a permanent suit, goggle, and cap tan, you might be a swimmer.

* If all you ever do is eat and sleep during school, you might be a swimmer.

* If all your saturday and friday nights are spent around water, you might be a swimmer.

* If The Toadies "I Come From The Water" is your theme song, you might be a swimmer.

* If the first thing you look at in a guy is abs, you might be a female (maybe even a male) swimmer.

* If you are at the school so early in the morning for practice that you beat the janitors there and the lights in the parking lot are off, you might be a swimmer.

*If a practice of only 5000 yards sounds like heaven to you, you might be a swimmer.

*If you practice 3 or more times a day during the summer, you might be a swimmer.

*If your used to takin a 2 miinute shower and rushing to get dressed just to make it to class a minute after the tardy bell rings, you might be a female swimmer.

* And finally, If every time someone complains about how early they got up to get ready for school, you turn around and bite their head off and almost beat the living **** out of them, you might be a swimmer.

*If your shoes always squeak when you walk down the hall, you might be a swimmer.

*If you walk around with minimal amounts of clothing on, you might be a swimmer.

*If the only thing you can talk about is swimming, you might be a swimmer.

*If you pee on the pooldeck then walk around barefoot, you might be a male swimmer.

*If there are wet towels over every door in your house, you might be a swimmer.

*If your siblings call you beefstick, man-shoulders, Amazon, or Behemoth (emphasis on the HE), you might be a swimmer
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.beautiful. · Posted: Sat Sep 01, 2007 6:34 pm Post subject:

You know you're Portuguese when..

01.You have at least one relative who wore a black
dress every day for an entire year after a funeral.

02.You spent your entire childhood thinking what you
ate for lunch was pronounced "sanweesha."

03.Your family dog understood Portuguese.

04. Every Sunday afternoon of your childhood was spent visiting your grandparents and extended family.

05. You've experienced the phenomena of 150 people
fitting into 50 square feet of yard during a family cookout.

06.You were surprised to discover the FDA recommends you eat three meals a day, not seven.

07.You thought killing the pig each year and having torressmos, morcella, linguica and a hanging dead pig from the ceiling was absolutely normal.

08.You ate sopa de covos for dinner at least three
times a week, and every Sunday.

09.You grew up thinking no fruit or vegetable had a fixed price and that the price of everything was
negotiable through haggling.

10.You were as tall as your grandmother by the age of
seven.

11.You thought everyone's last name ended in a vowel.

12.You thought nylons were supposed to be worn rolled to the ankles.

13.Your mom's main hobby is cleaning.

14.You were surprised to find out that wine was actually sold in stores.

15.You thought that everyone made their own bread.

16.You never ate meat on Christmas Eve or any Friday or that matter.

17.You ate your salad after the main course.

18.You thought Catholic was the only religion in the world.

19. Your were beaten at least once with a wooden spoon or broom.

20.You thought every meal had to be eaten with a hunk of bread in your left hand.

21.You can understand Portuguese but you can't speak it.

22.You have at least one relative who came over on the boat.

23.All of your uncles fled to America to not go to the war in Angola or they went to the war in Angola.

24.You have at least six male relatives named Tony, Luis, Joao, Fernando, Jose or Manel

25.You have relatives who aren't really your relatives.

26.You have relatives you don't speak to.

27.You drank wine before you were a teenager.

28.You were pinched under the arm in church by your mother.

29.You grew up in a house with a yard that didn't have
one patch of dirt that didn't have a flower or a vegetable growing, or a grape vine covering it.

30.Your grandparent's furniture was as comfortable as sitting on plastic. Wait!!!! You were sitting on plastic.

31.You thought that talking loud was normal.

32.You thought sugared almonds were common at all weddings.

33.You thought everyone got pinched on the cheeks and money stuffed in their pockets by their relatives.

34.Your mother is overly protective of the males in the family no matter what their age.

35. There was a crucifix in every room of the house,

36.You couldn't date a boy without getting approval from your father. (oh, and he has to be Portuguese)

37.You called any pasta "shpargett"

38.You dreaded taking out your lunch at school

39. Going out for a cup of coffee usually meant going out for a cup of coffee over Tia's house.

40 Every condition, ailment, misfortune, memory loss and accident was attributed to the fact that you didn't eat something.
_________________

“There's always that one person that you'll go back to, but you'll date other people but you kind of want to run into them when you're out”
-Lauren Conrad

“Fashions fade, style is eternal.”
-Yves Saint Laurent

-Sophie · Posted: Tue Jan 08, 2008 12:35 pm Post subject:

You know you're from Ottawa when...

You think that 613 is the only area code that exists and HATE having to dial it to call people now

You talk to people from other cities about shawarma and are mystified when they have no clue what the hell you're talking about

There was a point in time (or it is that point in time right now) when you wished you were 18 so you could drive, cab or bus to hull to get alcohol

You've been to "The China Store" in hull

You think Stittsville is the end of the universe

You've spent more then 4 days in one week at Rideau

You've waited 30 minutes for the OC transpo only to realize it came fucking early? Like, what the fuck is that?

You remember when the Scotiabank Place was still the Corel Centre, or better, Palladium

You've partied on Parliament Hill on Canada Day

You remember going on field trips to the museum of science and tech. every year of elementary school

You've travelled and waited for over half an hour just to get into Zak's Diner in the Byward Market

You can spot Spartacat out of a crowd of 19,000 people

A winter without going skating on the Rideau Canal just doesn't seem right

You have an irrational hatred for those ass holes in Toronto and everything they do, have done and will do

You've been to, and therefore fallen asleep at, a lynx game

You've thought that free 67's tickets were the best thing you could ever possible win, ever.

You're bilingual... or at least you can parler Franglais

You eat, sleep and breathe the Super Ex while it's open

You've swam in Mooney's Bay and had to shower for 2 hours afterwards to get that filthy, filthy water off of you

You don't flinch when asked if you want to eat a beavertail

You've been at the top of the peace tower and thought you were amazingly high just because nothing else is allowed to be taller then it

You've cheered for and a year later, booed Alexei Yashin

You remember the Roughriders, and wish the Renegades would come back

You've watched for yourself on Speaker's Corner on CHRO/The NewRO/A-Channel/Channel 6

You've seriously considered swimming in the Rideau Canal on one of those 30+ degree summer days

You remember a time when Patrick Lalime was kinda good

Everyone you know has some sort of story about how Alanis Morissette babysat their cousin's best friend's dog's original owner's son-in-law

You realize that MPs are your local celebrities

You swam in one of those sky blue concrete pools as a kid

You've ever been warned of the dangers of the "South Keys Swarmers"

You've taken the O-Train and wondered exactly why they ever built it

You wonder why Bluesfest is even called Bluesfest. Who knew the Black Eyed Peas could sing the blues?

You remember that Tom Green used to be funny

You know what a Dep is, and only go there for one thing

After just missing the 95, 96 or 97 you complain about waiting for the next one that comes in 5 minutes

You've been to a movie at the World Exchange Plaza, and regretted it for days

You complain about the lack of snow but only a year ago, you were complaining about too much snow

During grade school, you were warned about "The man in the white van."

You have at least one "Woohoo!" towel

You know that the women on Dalhousie Street, aren't just "friendly."

The word Vanier strikes fear into your heart, in fact you duck and cover any time you hear it

You've been to a parade that only consisted of a few emergency vehicles with banners, some people marching, and Kool FM/Hot 89.9 van

The dreaded Ice Storm combined with the teachers' strike made 1998 the best school year ever

You listened to 101.1 XFm, 93.9 KOOL FM and remember when the New Hot 89.9 was still new

You're pretty sure that the corner of Preston and Somerset is the only place in the world where China and Italy touch each other.

You learned French back in grade 1 from Dimoitou et ses amis

The only reason you would ever consider reading the Sun is to see if the Sunshine Girl is hot (don't lie to yourselves)

You remember RJ's Boom Boom Saloon turning into the Liquor Dome, whose days of serving alcohol to minors ended when it turned into Capital City music hall, which after a few David Usher and Massari shows turned into... well, condos.

When you've never been in Place D'Orleans. In fact, no one has ever been in Place D'Orleans, Ottawa or not...

You remember the amazing breakfast at the Golden Griddle before it turned into a Hooters and now some pub or something

You've ever heard someone at school yell "shag" or "shawg" or however the hell it's spelled

The Sens earned you some free pizza

You ever go out of town and the headlines report "Local Group Protests Ottawa's Decision." Hold on, guys! Don't blame the whole city!

You hear the Tulip Festival is coming and can't wait to see the concert line up! ...Queen of the Netherlands? Who the hell is that?

You've been thanked for your garbage in a shopping mall

You've been cut off in traffic by a car only to realize they had a Quebec plate.

You've gone to Herongate Mall only to realize you need to kill more than 8 minutes.

You actually know who the Capital Prophets were.

You constantly complain about the lack of good bands that come to town because they always skip from Toronto to Montreal.

You have a "special spot" where only you and 20,000 other people go to watch the Cananda Day fireworks.

You breathed a gigantic sigh of relief after you found out that the sens avoided salary arbitration and signed Ray Emery.

You or any of your 3 closest friends owns a Ray Emery shirt from the 2007 cup run.

You or at least one of your family members is employed by the federal government.

You know that Dan Akroyd, Paul Anka, Keisha Chante, Bruce Cockburn, Brendan Fraser, Tom Green, Jessica Holmes, Peter Jennings, Peter Mansbridge, Massari, Mark Mckinney, Alanis Morissette, Sandra Oh, Jesse Palmer, Matthew Perry, Barbra Ann Scott and Steve Yzerman are all from Ottawa and are damn proud of it. (With a few obvious exceptions)

pinkyswear · Miss Universe Joined: 29 Dec 2006 Posts: 1835 Smiles: +26

i love the swimmer ones because i used to be a swimmer too
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boarderlinefrenzy · Posted: Tue Jan 08, 2008 6:48 pm Post subject:

^you just gained love and sympathy from me. I currently am not swimming.
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pinkyswear · Miss Universe Joined: 29 Dec 2006 Posts: 1835 Smiles: +26

^ competitive swimming ftw !!

i remember when i used to smell like chlorine and have a bathing suit tan
and omfg flippers were the bessst!
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boarderlinefrenzy · Posted: Wed Jan 09, 2008 2:30 pm Post subject:

^what's ftw?

flippers? hah we call them fins. They give me cramps in my foot.
Yeah, I think even my organs smelled like chlorine
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pinkyswear · Miss Universe Joined: 29 Dec 2006 Posts: 1835 Smiles: +26

^haha for the win Happy

haha yeah i call them flippers, they give me cramps too but they are soo much fun to use !!

o and i remmeber waking up at like 4 in the morning to go to swim meets and stuff , goodtimes
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